Having focus is crucial to get to where you want to go in life.
For a second – Let’s compare our life journey to taking our car for a spin. I am sure we can all agree that when driving a vehicle it is best to focus on what is in front of us instead of what is behind us. Because when you keep focusing on what you see in the rearview mirror, eventually – and it wont take long – you will crash! This is exactly the same in life. When you keep dwelling on the past you are not going to move forward. You might even get dragged into exhausting discussions that are most definitely not going to contribute to any positive outcomes. The only good time to reflect on the past is when you are willing to take on board the lessons learned through your experiences, turn them into a guide on ‘how not to proceed’ and set new standards.
Instead, it is much better to focus on the line ‘from now to future’. All too often, people choose to focus on the immediate future instead of creating a vision which focuses on various points along that future-line, and so, work on a plan that allows them to draw the future to them one step at the time…
This process can be manifested by thinking the right thoughts; creating the right vibes; and constantly lifting your energy, so that consequently more of these good vibes come your way. Because what you focus on and what you spend your time and energy on, comes to you. That is scientifically proven!
This concept can be explained more clearly in the following example: when you are shopping for a certain car and you are doing research on a certain model that you really like, you will start to see that particular car everywhere you go. This is due to the focus function in the prefrontal cortex, the part of your brain you use to direct focus on your desires.
Just as that car you are interested in, which is now randomly popping up wherever you go, you can just as easily attract any vibe or energy in the same manner. And what is more, if your focus is strong enough, you can even manifest material things into your life.
Let’s not forget that we only rise by lifting others and on the flipside: misery loves company. Which vibration do you prefer?
It has come to my attention that many people choose to focus on things that do not bring them happiness. Often they choose to spend so much time and energy on things that don’t serve them in the slightest, so much so, that they get completely exhausted stewing over things they have no control over or cannot change.
If you recognize yourself in this pattern, I suggest: live and learn.
We cannot change the past. At least, after this not so pleasant experience, we now know what ‘not’ to do. We need to move on, hold our head high and keep walking. Of course it is much easier to play the blame game than to take responsibility for the situation we are in, however, in doing so, we give our power away instead of taking agency over our life. In any case, it is better to make your own decisons rather than handing someone else the key to your mind and allowing another person to govern your life
The good news is: There is a way out!!
In coaching, we call this an intervention-transition. This is a period of time we set/use to shift the client’s mindset. ‘Time’, being a very important factor here – The shift can occur as quick as half an hour, but usually takes a few hours or even a few days to give people a chance to integrate these new ideas. This timeframe will allow them to make the decision to see life through a different lens and shift perspective.
And at this exact moment, that realization is a game changer as we now focus on what we have instead of directing our focus on what we lack.
As Tony Robbins says: “Life happens for you not to you.” Also, once we can see that our bad day is someone else’s best day and we focus on the good things, and lovely people surrounding us in our lives instead of what is missing, then, and only then, we attract more great opportunities to us.
Only yesterday, I met up with a friend who was complaining how it is such a tragedy that we cannot travel due to the pandemic measures and how it is such a shame that so many people have lost their jobs. I immediately flipped the situation by saying: ‘Oh, but look at what we have! We live in the most beautiful part of Australia – by the beach. We don’t have any lockdowns enforced on us and we don’t have to wear a mask. If we desire to go for lunch or dine out we are free to do so… Not to mention, how we can use this occurrence as an opportunity to see the world from a different angle, to slow down, or to recognizing the local beauty all around us and to discover possibilities we had never even given any thought. I added:’ Now is the time to learn new things, take an interest in novel ideas and broaden our horizons.’
Her face lit up and said: ‘Wow, I never looked at it that way. You are right, there is so much we can do, I just couldn’t see it.’
There is always a way to turn a not so pleasant situation into a more enjoyable one. Hence, it all begins with being grateful for what you have: your health, agreed, health is not everything, but without health everything is nothing; your family, although they are not always the way we would like them to be; the country where you were born, although you often don’t realize it until you travel to less fortunate nations; the opportunity to be educated and learn, although that might not seem what you want at the time; and there are many more things to be grateful for…
I urge you to try this: When your world looks dull and things don’t go the way you had hoped, look at what you have and focus on the positive rather than on what is missing and I guarantee you ‘your life will become a remarkable experience’! After all, what you sow is what you will reap!